


The Riptide

by froobie



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Dragon Age Lore, Dragon Age: Inquisition Spoilers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Reunion Sex, Sexual Content, Smut, The Game, dragon age: inquisition post-game, elfy shit, weisshaupt, yay camping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-27
Updated: 2015-06-28
Packaged: 2018-04-01 13:16:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4021213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/froobie/pseuds/froobie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set several months after the defeat of Corypheus, Lavellan ditches the Inquisition and sets off to discover the truth of the history of Elvhenan but she ends up running into a certain someone. And then another certain someone. And then there is reunion sex. </p><p>(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧</p><p>Aaaannnd it's offically AU (yay dlc~)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Searching for the Truth

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KeeperLavellan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KeeperLavellan/gifts).



Fira Lavellan played the role as leader of Inquisition out of duty. She hated being an Andrastian religious figure. She hated making decisions for the Inquisition. Every time the burden fell to her, she thought it was obvious the shem’s were saddling her with the responsibility so if and when things went poorly they could just blame the _savage Dalish knife-ear_.  
Fira grew very resentful of her advisors after her clan was massacred in Wycome. She trusted very few people while she was in the Inquisition.

About 8 months after Corypheus was defeated, and all known rifts were closed, she decided she was 100% done being the shem’s political and religious pawn so she ditched them secretly in the middle of the night and headed west towards the Tirashan Forest. 

After the Temple of Mythal, the strange things that had been reported about the Tirashan coupled with the incident involving their Emissary and the Marquis, she became suspicious that there was a similar temple there in the Deep Woods where she may find more ancient elvhen who could answer her many questions about the true history of Elvhenan.

The Inquisition searches for her desperately. For some time they were able to keep the news of her disappearance under wraps, but as time went on whispers began to spread across Thedas, threatening the Inquisitions stability, making it all the more dire that they find their Herald of Andraste.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------

She had made her way through the farmlands skirting the heavily populated areas of Serault. Twilight fell as she approached the first lightly wooded areas of the Tirashan so she decided to make camp before venturing too deep into the trees. Traveling alone meant sleeping without a fire as well as a heightened paranoia of being discovered while she slept. She couldn’t have been asleep for long when she awoke with a start, the hairs on the back of her neck standing on end. 

Someone was near. 

She couldn’t see them yet, or hear them, but she sensed them. She had hunkered down behind a large cluster of boulders, and it was only moments before she was able to pick out the sound of footsteps approaching the opposite side of the rocks. She clutched the staff that had been resting in her lap and readied herself to cast a barrier spell. The light footsteps began to round the boulders and her mind began racing. _Did this person know she was there? Had the Inquisition finally caught up to her? Surely it must be another traveler searching for a sheltered spot to rest for the night?_ She held her breath as the figure of an armored man in a hood moved into view from behind the boulder. For the first moment he was only a silhouette against the moon shining over his shoulder and she opened her mouth to produce a cautious greeting. But her eyes adjusted and her voice hitched as she realized the man who stood before her was someone she had met before.

“A...Abelas??” 

Abelas stared down at her. “Inquisitor.” His eyes narrowed as though he wasn’t quite sure it was her.

“What are you-- Why--” she couldn’t decide what question to ask first. She had struck a truce with him in the Temple of Mythal, but they both knew it had ended when he walked away from the Well. She rose to her feet and grounded herself against the boulder. He had replaced his ornate armor from the Temple with a more inconspicuous set and she saw no indication of standard Inquisition issue on his equipment, but that didn’t necessarily mean...“Are you with the Inquisition now?”

Abelas did not move. His voice was stern when he spoke. “I am not.” He paused. “I am here to speak with you.” He offered with a hint of irritation in his tone.

Fira squinted at him, still utterly baffled at his presence. “Okay…” She didn’t even try to hide her confusion and it came out sounding more like a question. “You’ve followed me halfway across Thedas to speak to me. Fine.” She pushed herself off the boulder and stood to her full height. “So…?” She added an edge to her tone to make up for her obvious initial bafflement.  
Abelas regarded her for moment and then gestured to her extinguished campfire. “Perhaps we could light a fire and sit.” 

“Alright then…” She said hesitantly. She sat down slowly and he followed suit, sitting straight across from her. A quick spell had the campfire crackling within moments.  
Fira held her palms out to feel the warmth of the fire and watched Abelas as he lowered his chin to pull the hood off his head. Her eyes flickered across his face. Through the orange glow of the fire, she could see that his vallaslin was gone. 

Abelas settled his hands on his knees and narrowed his eyes. “I have no interest in playing games here, Inquisitor, I have been sent to find you and ask you to return to the Inquisition.”

Fira raised an eyebrow at him. “So you are here on behalf of the Inquisition?”

“No.” Abelas gave a short irritated exhale. “I was sent by a mutual acquaintance who believes the Inquisition is the only organization with the ability to keep the mark safe from falling into the hands of those who would misuse it.”

Fira blinked at him as she processed the statement. She felt her insides flutter though she wasn’t sure if it was from relief or increasing anxiety. _Had Abelas become a common mercenary since the loss of the Well? Would he have known the spell to remove his own vallaslin? Her mind raced as she remembered the words shared between Solas and Abelas at the Well of Sorrows. Could Abelas have met up with Solas? Is Solas the mutual a--??_ She forced her mind to kill that train of thought, not wanting to let herself think about him.  
Abelas watched her with a blank expression and she realized she had let the silence last a beat too long.

“I disagree.” She stated flatly, summoning the skills of cold nonchalance she had perfected while playing The Game in Halamshiral. Abelas did not react, obviously expecting the conversation to go this route. “Tell me Abelas, who are you running errands for? Who is this supposed mutual acquaintance?”

Abelas grimaced at her and let a short grunt escape his throat. “I have no need to explain my personal arrangements with you. As for the one who sent me…” Abelas seemed smug as he paused mid-sentence. “You would know him as Solas.”

Her heart sank but she kept her voice steady. “You expect me to believe that _Solas_ sent you to find me...because he was worried about the Anchor and he wants me to rejoin the Inquisition?”

Abelas tilted his head slightly. “Honestly I expect nothing from you. I agreed to track you down to repay a debt. I have delivered the message that was a part of the agreement. I have no personal stake in what you do now.”

Fira squinted at him. The idea that Solas didn’t trust her to protect the Anchor, _her_ Anchor, and that he would condescend to send a _messenger_ to tell her what to do with her own life filled her with a hot rage that crept up her neck and burned her cheeks. She hoped it was dark enough that Abelas didn’t notice.

“So you’re not planning on dragging me back to the Inquisition?”

“No.”

“You were given no instructions on what to do if I refused?”

“None that I care to follow.” 

Fira glared at him. “He really sent you out of concern for the Anchor?” She tried not to let the hurt bleed into the tone of her voice.

Abelas made another soft grunt. “He said you would know the answer to that question.”

Fira clenched her teeth. “Well...that’s obnoxious.”

“I agree.” Abelas crossed his arms and waited expectantly for her next question.

The information was far too much for her though and she broke eye contact to stare into the blue center of the campfire. “...Where is he?” She asked softly, hardly even expecting him to hear her.

“You do not need to know that.” Abelas dismissed.

Fira let out an irritated sigh. She knew Abelas was plenty aware that he had the upper hand in the conversation. It was also unfortunately obvious that she was still recovering from the shock of his appearance and the revelations regarding Solas. She had to knock him back a little if she was going to get anything useful out of him. So she tore her gaze away from the fire to look directly into his eyes. “Did Solas remove your vallaslin?”

Abelas’ breath hitched slightly and his features softened for a quick moment. 

Good, he wasn’t expecting that question. 

“That is not a topic that is up for discussion.” He was obviously annoyed. For a moment his eyes glanced across her own bare forehead, though he said nothing. She had long since grown a thick skin in regards to her “missing” vallaslin but she wondered if Solas would have told him not to bring it up.

Fira shrugged at him. “Just curious, I suppose I don’t need to know.” He stared at her blankly. “We definitely should just sit here in silence until morning...no use in bonding over our annoyingly condescending and pretentious _mutual acquaintance_.” He blinked at her.

“I…” Abelas looked down to his arms still crossed over his chest. “I take no pleasure in whatever unpleasantness I have brought you tonight. I will not stay longer than needed.” He shifted his body to rise off the ground. 

An “Oh…” escaped Fira’s mouth as she watched him stand and place his hood back over his head.

Abelas paused on his feet. “Inquisitor...the mark you bear is unique and extremely powerful. There are many who would stop at nothing to obtain that power. You are strong but you are not invincible. The Inquisition may not be perfect but it is a place where you and that power will be safe. Please consider returning to your...friends.” With that he gave a small nod and turned to leave. 

“You’re going back to him. Aren’t you.” Fira sprung to her feet.

He turned and met her eyes only for a moment before glancing down to the ground. He seemed to wrestle with his thoughts but only for a second and then he had his back to her again. 

“What if I followed you?” She demanded before he even had a chance to take his first step.

“I do not recommend it.” He said without turning around.

“That’s not really an answer…” 

Abelas looked back her. _Was he smirking? _He shrugged and began walking away.__

__Fira snatched her backpack off the ground and followed._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Abelas is absolutely playing The Game.


	2. There Was A Reason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few conversations from the road.

They walked north all night without speaking, Fira stayed several yards behind him out of caution, still not trusting him or the situation completely. It was mid-morning before he stopped suddenly and turned around to look at her. 

“You may as well come join me!” He called to her. Fira hesitated but approached him. When she was close enough for a normal speaking voice Abelas spoke to her again. “I am going to eat and take a nap. I imagine you are both hungry and tired as well.”

Fira shrugged nonchalantly at him. “I could eat.”

They wandered for a few minutes towards the sounds of a stream. There they were able to fill their water skins and set up a small camp.

“So...I don’t suppose you’d be willing to tell me where we’re headed?” Fira asked after what seemed like an eternity of silence sitting at the campfire.

Abelas was still chewing on his jerky but he exhaled through his nose and looked up at her. “I am headed to the Anderfels. You may go wherever you like.”

“Right. Creators...the Anderfels...never been there. I’ve heard fascinating stories about the grey wardens at Weisshaupt though. Oh! Are we going to Weisshaupt??”

“Near there maybe.” Abelas laid back into the dirt and tugged his hood over his face, signaling the end of the conversation.

It was awhile before Fira let herself fall asleep. She was exhausted but her mind was racing with all the possible reasons why Abelas would be letting her follow him. He was obviously getting something out of it. She hadn’t discounted the suspicion that he was luring her back to the Inquisition or even someone else with the intention of misusing the Anchor. 

Her plan to explore the Tirashan was important to her, but finding out what Solas was up to was far more enticing. He had left far too many questions unanswered. And it was only when he disappeared that she had truly begun to distrust the information he had shared about himself. When Leliana reported the state of his so-called village of origin, a strange thought had entered her mind, and no matter how absurd it seemed she couldn’t shake it. Could Solas be like Abelas? An elvhen displaced in time through the legendary Uthenera? The memory of the words the two men had shared by the well only served to fuel the bizarre concept. She couldn’t let it go. He had reached out to her...no matter how condescending and indifferent he had made it seem. She would not waste the opportunity to get answers.

Just before she drifted off to the Fade she resolved to extract as much information from Abelas as possible before they got to...wherever he was taking her.

  


  
_A couple of days later…_  


The sun was close to disappearing behind the trees to the west, putting a chill in the air. Neither one of them had spoken for hours leaving Fira free to deliberate on how she was going to coax out the information she wanted from Abelas. She had initially thought it would be best to let the subject of the Temple or Elvhenan come up more organically, but that apparently wasn’t going to happen. Abelas only spoke when he wanted to apparently. He had even on more than one occasion simply ignored her when she tried to strike up a conversation. So Fira decided she might as well try asking him what she wanted to know without any pretext of small talk. She certainly couldn’t get any less information than she already was.

“Abelas…” From behind she could see his head turn slightly to indicate he was listening. ”You said something when we first met in the Temple...about how it was destroyed--” 

Abelas stopped suddenly and turned around, a sharp expression on his face.  
“I will not discuss it.” He said firmly.

Fira tried again. “Oh...I mean I was just wondering--”

He took a heavy step towards her and glared down at her from his full height.  
“ _I will not discuss it_.” 

Fira had not expected him to be so obviously affected by the subject and she wondered how frayed she could make him by continuing.  
She lifted a hand to concede. “Alright…” 

Abelas relaxed his shoulders and started to turn around but she couldn’t help but poke at him one more time.

“What about Arlathan? Did you--” He stiffened but instead of appearing angry like he had before, he moved calmly and purposefully to look straight into her eyes.

“Shemlen.” His voice was steady and low. “I do not wish to discuss the past. If you need to know something, I will tell you. But I will not engage in idle chatter about a world that died millennia ago... especially not with _you_.”

Something about his calm was far more offputting than his anger and it took Fira a few moments to find her voice. 

“I understand…” She shrugged at him. “I’ll ask you something about Solas then.” Abelas moved to protest but she spit out her question before he could. “ _Is he like you?_ ”

Abelas’ arms fell to his sides and his brow arched slightly. “Like me?”

Fira spoke faster than she meant to, suddenly fueled by the possibility that he was willing to answer _this_ question. “Yeah is he….Elvhen? Is he from your time? Creators that sounds weird---It’s just the way you two spoke at the Well---and so many things he has said and done---and he talks so much about what things were really like---and the fade---and when I found out it was possible---that Uthenera was---” She realized she was babbling and stopped to take a breath and examine Abelas’ expression.

His face was blank. Fira opened her mouth but was cut off by something that sounded somewhere between a grunt and a chuckle from Abelas. The corners of his lips twitched upwards, just barely enough for her to see. He turned around and began walking again.  
He was doing that thing he did...ending the conversation instead of telling her No. 

_Does that mean Yes?_ She had thought on the possibility of Solas’ true origin for so long that she could barely differentiate between what was plausible and what was absurd. The prospect of her theory being even remotely accurate hit her in waves that sent her stomach turning. She took a few breaths before she started walking again, convincing herself to regain control. 

_No sense in freaking out right now...he didn’t even really confirm it…_

Fira pulled her hood up around her face to block the icy breeze, and thought about how...maybe soon...she could ask Solas herself.

  


  
_A few more days after that…_  


Abelas sat himself down on a large rock and pulled off one his boots, shaking it upside down to knock loose the pebbles and dust from travel.

They had been trekking along the eastern edge of the rocky Blasted Hills for days and they were finally starting to see actual plants and trees instead of just brittle, dry brush. Fira was about to drop herself down into the dirt when something caught her eye. Wedged underneath and between the rock Abelas was sitting on and the boulder to his side was a thick broken branch. 

_The perfect size for whittling_ , she realized.

Fira made a beeline for the chunk of wood causing Abelas to lean back and raise a brow at her. “Oh...ignore me...” She said dismissively as she snatched the branch out from behind him. 

Abelas looked at her like she had three heads.

Fira shrugged at him then turned to find a rock to sit back against. She hadn’t had a chance to fiddle with her carving knife since Abelas had shown up and the thought of digging into a fresh piece of wood sounded as comforting as a hot bath, or a nap in soft grass on a sunny day.  
She had just started cutting away the first few big chunks when she heard Abelas grunt.

Fira’s head shot up, Abelas was watching her with an obnoxiously amused look on his face. “You have something to say?” Fira gave her best indifferent tone as she returned to her carving.

“Do you carve often?” Abelas asked, though it sounded like he knew the answer.

Fira glanced up at him to see his expression still hadn’t changed. “Hmmmm…” she breathed. “It’s sort of a meditation thing I guess. I find it very relaxing and it keeps my head clear. Do you do anything like that?” She poked.

Abelas ignored the question. “What do you carve?” He was still grinning.  
_What is he getting at?_ Fira thought suspiciously as she squinted back at him.

“Uhhh...nothing terribly inspired...little toy daggers...fish...lots of animals.” Fira kept digging at the wood with her knife.

“Mhmm…..hounds?” Abelas shoved his foot back into his boot.

Fira paused to glance at him again. He was no longer grinning but his eyes were narrowed at her and he looked incredibly pleased with himself. “Yah. That’s a traditional one actually. It’s based off of a Dalish tale.” Abelas kept his eyes narrowed on her expectantly so she offered more. “Lot’s of Dalish carve that one. I don’t know... maybe you know it?” She returned her gaze to the work in her hands. “It’s about this hound that bites off Fen’Harel’s tail in a chase to protect his keeper.” Fira lifted her knife to her lips and blew the splinter dust from the blade. When she looked to Abelas again his expression had changed drastically, it was darker, sharper, he was studying her. She froze at the sudden change.

“I do not know the tale, but I have seen such a carving before.” Abelas’ expression softened but the abrupt change in his countenance roused Fira’s nerves. She had said something that bothered him. _Something he didn’t want to give away?_ He was attempting to steer the conversation though, he wanted to offer her some bit of information. And she wasn’t dim enough to think it didn’t somehow benefit him to share it.

“Oh? I suppose you wish to tell me _where_ you saw it?” Fira lowered her hands to show him she was listening. 

Abelas looked pleased with himself again. “ _Solas_ carries a small hound carving with him in his pack. I’ve only seen it once or twice. Now that you mention it...it did seem to have something in it’s mouth…” Abelas stretched his arms up and behind his head, leaning his head back casually into his threaded hands.

 _So that was his Game_. Fira’s heart pounded in her chest. She hunched her shoulders forward and began cutting aggressively into the wood. No wonder Abelas had been so pleased with himself. He had made the connection immediately and knew he would be able to fluster her with what he knew. Was he really solely interested in agitating her though? Poking at old wounds? Fira didn’t know him that well but she was certain he had some deeper intention. It was clear that he had succeeded though...in whatever goal he had had for the conversation..but…  
_The image of his dark and scrutinizing expression flashed through her mind._  
She had said something that threw him off as well.  
She would not forget the words that had won her that expression, it was the closest she had gotten him to giving something up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's all think about the layers of meaning to Solas keeping a Hound with Fen'Harel's tail in it's mouth carving that Lavellan made in his backpack and cry it out. Hnngg T_T


	3. I Collided Into You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here you go, here's the smut.

_“We should reach the rendezvous point before nightfall.”_ Abelas had told her that morning. 

The reality that their journey would be over that day hit Fira’s nerves hard. She was still not convinced that Abelas was taking her to Solas. She spent the day going over scenarios in her head, making tentative plans on how to react to different attacks, different numbers of enemies, reminding herself to be ready but to not exhaust herself mentally in the meantime. 

It did occur to her though, that she may have spent too much time thinking about what she would do in an attack scenario and not enough time thinking about what she would say to Solas. Who was, at that moment, staring at her with an infuriated expression on his face from just about six yards away.

Abelas was a blurry figure standing somewhere in between them and Fira couldn’t have looked at him even if she wanted to, but she knew he must have the most obnoxiously pleased expression on his face. He mumbled something (or maybe she just couldn’t hear over the pounding of blood pumping through her head?) and walked away from them past Solas and out of view.

“You were not supposed to come here.” Solas finally spoke, looking more angry than he sounded.

“I’m not _supposed_ to do anything, and if I were, it would not be _you_ deciding it.” Fira’s voice sounded more hateful than she meant it to, prompting her to shut her eyes and take a deep, slow breath. When she opened her eyes Solas was walking towards her. Her cheeks began burning and her eyes stung but she willed herself to remain in control.

Solas stopped a few feet away from her and laced his fingers behind his back. “I was concerned about your safety--” 

Fira cut him off with a short sarcastic laugh. “Oh concerned about me? Or the Anchor? Do you even realize that there is a difference??” She was no longer making any effort not to yell.

Solas tilted his chin upwards and spoke in a harsh tone. “There is not enough of a difference that you did not threaten the whole world when you made the careless, self-centered decision to leave the safety of the Inquisition to... what? Get yourself killed in the Tirashan Forest?! Seized by any number of dangerous organizations that would use the Anchor for destruction?! Was that your brilliant plan, Inquisitor??”

“Wow!” Fira gasped as though she had been socked in the gut. “You’re really going to--Aaugh!!” She crossed her arms tightly over her chest in an attempt to restrain her anger. “You gave up any right you had to judge my safety or my actions when you deserted me, Solas.”

Solas gave a sharp frustrated sigh. “You should not have left.”

Fira glared up him. “I hope the hypocrisy is not lost on you there.”

Solas growled and lifted a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose in aggravation.  
She watched him for some time. She could see his face behind his hand, eyes closed, stewing in anger. 

When he finally lowered his hand his expression had softened. “Why did you come here?” His voice sounded tired and sad, abating her anger into hurt and shame.

“I…” Her voice faltered. She looked down at his feet and tried again. “You promised me answers...but... you left.”

Solas was silent for a few moments before he spoke softly. “I’m sorry. I did not leave out of a desire to betray you. Please belie---”

“OH! _Well_ then!” Fira’s head snapped back up to look him in the eyes. “And why _did_ you leave? Because what it looks like from my angle is that all you ever wanted was that orb. How much of what you ever said to me was lies, Solas??” Her feet moved her towards him of their own accord until their toes were touching. “You can’t even imagine what it’s like to be left to wonder on that question---to not even understand _why_.” She lost the battle with her control and hot tears began falling down her cheeks. The embarrassment and anger from letting him see her cry killed her voice, ending her rant. 

Solas hung his head and looked down at their feet. “You’re right. I did not leave the way I should have.” He shifted his weight. “I was...upset--not with you--but with myself. I am sorry.” 

Fira rolled her eyes as she wiped the wetness from her face. “You know...if you tell me you’re sorry one more time I may have to send a stonefist straight into your gut.”

Solas looked up at her and examined her face. “I was not lying when I told you what we had was real. I cannot answer all of your questions, but please believe that much...it is important to me that you do.”

Fira glared at him. The tenderness and sincerity in his voice made her believe him but that mostly just annoyed her. She studied his face as he looked down at her and very suddenly became aware of how close they were standing. She could smell him, she could feel the warmth of his body heat. Before she had a chance to fight it, she was overcome with the undeniable temptation to press herself against his chest. Instead she lifted her hands and placed them on either side of his face, searching his eyes for some hint of his thoughts.

He looked almost frightened, as though he was fighting a battle with himself in his mind.

Fira exhaled and almost let go of his face but in a flash his expression had turned dark and firm and she froze. Suddenly his hands were gripping her waist and pulling her into him and she gasped in surprise. He lowered his forehead to rest on hers and mumbled something in elvhen that she didn’t understand then cursed under his breath. “Fenedhis...Vhenan, I tried but you make me crazy.”

Fira’s heart was in her throat otherwise she might have been quick enough to ask him what he meant by _I tried_. Her curiosity was gone in the next second though when Solas bent lower to press a kiss into her lips.

She returned the kiss instantly and eagerly, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him further into her. He let her into his mouth and the taste of him called up a flood of sweet memories that left her feeling intoxicated. Solas slid his hands down over her hips and paused to squeeze her ass before landing at her thighs to lift her up, wrapping her legs around him. She squeezed her legs tightly around his waist and pulled away from his mouth to lay a trail of kisses along his jawline while he stumbled towards a nearby tree to press her against the trunk. Fira let out a small cry as her back slammed against the rugged bark. 

Solas gave a dark chuckle “I have missed that sound, Vhenan.” 

She felt her cheeks burn but suddenly he was kissing her again and turning his shoulder up against the tree to lower her down to the soft dirt on the ground below. She writhed underneath him, the feel of his weight on top of her filling her with desire. But he pulled back and sat up, her legs still hooked around his thighs. 

Solas grinned down at her as he began undoing the clasps and belts of his coat. Fira did the same and once Solas was down to his fleece shirt he leaned forward to help her pull off her coat and tunic. The moment her breasts were free, Solas’ face was buried in her chest. His lips and tongue were hot against her skin and she couldn’t help but gasp and laugh as he licked and sucked at each nipple. Fira grasped the nape of his neck and arched her back to press herself harder into him. He wrapped his arms around her and worked his way up to her clavicle then up her neck, leaving a trail of wet, red marks behind his mouth. 

Fira reached down his back and began grabbing at his shirt to pull it over his head. He finished her work for her and fell back against her body and mouth, his tongue clashing with hers. His body was hot and heavy against her and she could feel his hardness digging into her thigh. Every inch of skin touching skin felt electric and the sensation seemed to gather and pool in her cunt leaving her aching and squirming underneath him. Fira raked her fingernails down his back causing him to growl and flinch away from her, leaving room for her to reach between them and unlace his breeches. Solas rolled his hips into her hands and gave a low chuckle, brushing his lips against her ear. “Do you want me inside you, Vhenan?” 

Fira moaned in the affirmative, finally freeing his cock from his breeches, she wrapped her fingers around him and gave a soft pump. Solas’ breath hitched and his hips jerked involuntarily into the sensation. He groaned and buried his face into her shoulder, letting her stroke him a few more times before he pulled back and began hastily unlacing her breeches. Loosening them just enough to yank them over her hips, taking her smallclothes with them, he lifted her legs towards his shoulder to pull off her boots and free her from her breeches entirely.

Solas sat back on his knees, no longer in a hurry, he slowly slid his hands under her thighs to spread her legs and pull her up against him. Fira watched him gaze at her, setting her skin alight with heat as his eyes trailed down her body... her neck, her heaving breasts, down to her wet, aching cunt. 

She moaned and squirmed. “Solas…” she pleaded but it only seemed to inspire him to move slower. He slid his hands gently out from under her thighs and up towards her abdomen. The sensation was agonizing and she gasped and writhed under his touch. 

A low chuckle rumbled from his throat. “Yes, Vhenan?” 

“Please…” She moaned. 

“Please what?” He teased, lowering himself over her and walking his hands up either side of her body until he was hovering directly above her, looking straight into her eyes.

Fira’s eyes locked with his and her heart lurched. Her stomach was twisting, her legs were shaking, and her cunt was throbbing for him. She reached up, hooking her arms around his shoulders and tried to pull him into her but he didn’t budge. He grinned at her.

“Just.. _fuck me_!” She gasped, still pulling on his shoulders. Solas’ grin widened as he pressed himself onto her, pushed his cock into her, gathered her up into his arms, and buried his face into her neck. She cried out for him, each thrust more perfect than the last, filling her with sensation, a constant satisfaction mixed with the desire and the need for more.

Putting all of his weight onto one elbow, he slid a hand up her neck and threaded his fingers into her hair, making a fist and pulling her head back. She clung to him, nails pressing into his skin, she gasped and moaned as he drove into her, unrelenting, deeper and harder every moment. 

Solas laid scattered wet kisses across her throat, murmuring old elvhen words she couldn’t understand, but sent her reeling. She was getting close to the edge when she whimpered out between tiny gasps, “ _I missed you..so much…_ ”

“ _Ar lath ma._ ” He breathed, freeing her hair from his grasp and moving his hand in between them to stroke her clit. The sensation shot white hot pleasure through her body and she cried out in staggered breaths as she came around him, her cunt clenching and stroking him to pull him over the edge with her.

Thrusting through the orgasm he caught her mouth in a tender kiss. Fira slid her hands under his arms and up his chest until they were resting on either side of his jaw, her fingertips gently brushing his ears. “Ar lath ma.” She whispered into his lips.

“Ma sa’lath.” He whispered, nuzzling her cheek and rolling to one side, sliding his arm up to rest under her neck and curl over her shoulder. She snuggled herself up against him, tucking her head under his chin and shutting her eyes. “Mmmm.” She hummed and Solas echoed her, his throat vibrating against her cheek.

Solas exhaled slowly and indulged in the closeness, laying the palm of his free hand on her waist, gliding slowly up her back then back down to rest on her ass. 

They stayed like that for some time, Fira dozing in and out, not quite making it to the fade but not quite awake. The sky had grown dark by the time she was pulled out of her serene state, feeling the sudden heat of a fire Solas had cast behind her back. She gave a tiny grunt and snuggled into him, hearing a light chuckle deep in his chest. 

“I thought perhaps you might be cold.” His voice rumbled from her position under his chin. His hand began sliding up and down her back.

“I’m perfect.” She breathed, pressing a kiss into his throat.

Solas swallowed and exhaled and she knew something was weighing on him. He was overthinking again. Sensing the words waiting on his tongue, she stiffened slightly and braced for him to speak.

“You cannot come with us.” He said, moving his hand to the back of her head, combing his fingers into her hair.

Fira’s stomach turned and she clenched her hands into fists, pressing them into his chest. “Solas, do we really have to do this now…” Her voice trembled slightly, desperate to keep him next to her.

“Fira...the longer we wait the more it hurts.” But he sounded more like he was talking to himself than to her.

“Deal with it.” She said bitterly, wrapping her arm over his ribs to pull him closer. She squeezed her eyes shut and held her breath for a few moments while Solas stayed quiet. “Let’s just...pretend a little longer... ok?” Her tone turning soft and anxious.

Solas said nothing but sighed heavily and held her with both arms, settling himself lower into the ground to rest his head.

She melted into him, memorizing how he felt and smelled, pleading with her body to stay awake so she could prolong the moment. But it wasn’t very long before she was lulled to sleep by the rhythm of his steady breathing. 

When she awoke in the morning she was alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	4. Just Like a Spark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I keep adding on to what I meant to write originally oops oops oops oh well.

It was dawn when Fira woke up alone by the tree. Solas had apparently draped her coat over her before he left. A thoughtful gesture, she supposed, for the kind of man who would leave his sa’lath to wake up alone. Evenso, she noted how relaxed she must have been to not be woken up by his movements. That is the the sort of peace he brought to her, just by being by her side. 

She got dressed slowly, grimacing at the cold damp on her linen underthings from the morning dew. It left a chill on her skin that she couldn’t quite shake off, and she tried to pretend it had nothing to do with how lonely she felt at that moment. 

Fira was about half dressed before she caught the scent of a campfire in the air. Once she had gathered up all of her equipment she headed off into the trees to investigate. She walked for several minutes, when she started to see movement and flame between the trees she began her cautious, quiet approach. She quickly realized it was Abelas crouching over the fire and a few steps closer revealed another figure. She exhaled as a weight she hadn’t realized was there lifted from her chest. Solas was there, sitting on a fallen log, his hands busily working at something in his lap. She continued her quiet advance until she was just outside the small clearing. 

“Good morning!” She broke the silence in an upbeat tone. Both men glanced at her, obviously not surprised to see her. 

“Good morning, Inquisitor.” Abelas offered after a moment. He was still crouched by the fire, now she could see he was spearing strips of meat onto sticks and setting them over the flames to cook. 

She looked to Solas who was focused on the work in his lap, apparently mending the lining of his coat. There was an odd tension in the air, for a moment she thought it was her presence but as she glanced between Solas and Abelas she picked up on something else; they had been arguing. 

She moved towards the fallen log and sat down next to Solas. Her knee nudged his as she swung her pack to rest between her feet. He seemed to stiffen slightly, but he turned his head to look at her and he smiled earnestly. The expression on his face was so familiar and for that moment he was the man from last year, before everything went to pieces. The man who was sweet and attentive, who could make her laugh and blush and feel safe and whole. But it didn’t last. He swallowed and his eyes flickered towards the ground and he turned back to the work in his lap. 

Fira leaned down and opened her pack to retrieve her waterskin but found it empty.

“Baah…” She grumped dropping her waterskin back into her pack. 

“You can have mine.” Came Solas’ voice from beside her. He twisted to reach behind the log and produced a full waterskin. He popped the top off before handing it to her.

“Mmm thank you, Solas.” Fira said coyly. Locking her eyes with his, she gently parted her lips and delicately, slowly, pressed the tip of her tongue against the spout before closing her mouth around it.

Solas’ lips twitched as he fought an amused grin. Shaking his head slightly he returned his gaze to the coat in his lap. Fira watched him as she took a swig of water and noted a distinct pinkness creep up his ears. 

Mission accomplished. 

In the past, Solas would have likely responded to such a display by whispering something utterly filthy in her ear, but he seemed so much more reserved now. It made her a little sad, but she did make him smile, so she counted it as a win. 

“So…” Fira began, but Solas answered her before she could finish.

“Abelas and I are leaving tomorrow before dawn. Today we prepare for our journey.”

“And where is your journey taking you?” 

Solas exhaled through his nose. “Abelas and I are headed to Weisshaupt fortress. The Grey Wardens have been keeping a very dangerous elvhen artifact there for centuries and we mean to retrieve it.”

“Like the orb?”

Solas paused in thought. “Not quite, but similar enough I suppose.”

“And you expect the Grey Wardens to just...let you take it?”

“Not at all.” Solas picked up a knife from the log beside him and cut the string he was working with. Fira watched him as he took a moment to inspect his work then don the newly repaired coat. He shrugged and adjusted it on his shoulders and then turned his head to look at her. She expected him to keep talking or smile or...something. But instead he studied her, searched her eyes, and she stared back at him, her chest suddenly too heavy to breathe properly. She felt his hand slide over her knee and---

“We were supposed to meet with a contact from inside the fortress weeks ago but we have not heard from her.” Abelas’ voice interrupted the moment and startled Fira’s gaze away from Solas. She felt him squeeze her knee slightly before releasing her. 

“We’ve heard rumors of some sort of unrest within the fortress. The order is apparently unable to govern itself and now they are all stuck inside killing each other like caged gurguts.” 

“If we are lucky we will find them all dead by the time we arrive.” Solas interrupted with a disgusted grunt.

Fira inhaled and widened her eyes knowingly at Abelas who threw her a look in return before he continued.

“If the fortress is in chaos when we arrive it will likely work to our advantage in retrieving the item we seek. If it is not…”

“We will stick to the previously discussed plan.” Solas interrupted again, his voice harsh and his eyes glaring at Abelas.

Fira glanced back and forth between them, raising her brow at the sudden spike in tension. Abelas grunted and rose to his feet, unabashedly glaring back at Solas for several moments.

“Of course, hahren.” Abelas finally offered, that familiar look of annoying self-satisfaction on his face. 

_Hahren??_ Fira’s breath hitched and she could feel Solas stiffen beside her. She had spent enough time with Abelas to know that he was playing the Game again. Her mind raced as she recalled the way he had responded when she asked him about the truth of Solas’ origin. Was he being sarcastic? Was it a genuine hint?? And if it was...if Abelas was truly...creators...the concept of Solas being older than Abelas made Fira feel...dizzy.

Abelas, evidently feeling quite good about his success, turned to walk off into the trees, smirking at Fira as he left the clearing. 

_Ok...so apparently I’m asking him about this right now. Here we go…_

She tried to breathe normally but her stomach was in knots and she wasn’t quite sure what breathing normally felt like anymore. She looked to Solas who seemed furious but strangely calm. When he turned to meet her gaze she could tell he was deep in thought, and it filled her with sudden dread that he might formulating more lies, more excuses...some way to dismiss her before she even got the chance to…

“Solas…” She tried to keep her voice as even as possible. “... I wanted to ask you something…”

The tension in his expression seemed to melt away. He smiled and lowered his chin and leaned into her, taking her chin in between his finger and thumb. 

“Vhenan.” His voice was deep and heavy and she could feel his breath hot on her lips. He tilted her chin and pressed a kiss into the corner of her mouth. 

Fira’s cheeks felt hot, though she wasn’t quite sure if it was rage or arousal. 

“Solas.” She said flatly as he trailed kisses across her cheek to her ear. “Are you really trying to distract me…” Her voice wavered as his lips brushed past her ear and began laying kisses down her throat, his hand flattening and sliding behind her neck to pull her closer.

“ **Solas**.” She repeated as his other hand snaked around her waist and pulled her body into his.

Fira shut her eyes and a moan escaped her lips. Solas’ hands were at the front of her coat working to undo the belt and her resolve was wavering but her mind cut in _Now now now, spit it out now._ Her hands went stiff on his shoulders and she pushed back as much as her body would let her.

“Just tell me Solas---how old _are you_.” Solas’ movements slowed as he wrapped his arms back around her waist and dropped his forehead to rest on her shoulder. “...How many ages have you....Solas I wont be angry--I just need some bit of truth to explain things...something to hold onto--please…” The questions sounded so absurd coming out of her mouth and she wanted to laugh at herself but instead she kept going.

“Abelas...he called you _elvhen_ at the Temple of the Mythal and yet I’m just a _shadow_?? And now _hahren_...and I figure if someone is in uthenera for a couple thousand years they would learn a lot about the fade..and spirits...and…” Fira let go of every suspicious thought, every connection she had ever tried to ignore spilled out of her mouth.

“Were you...are you bound to one of the gods? Is that why you were so adamant about me not drinking from the well? Why you told me about the origins of vallaslin? Was the orb...was it something you were meant to protect?”

Solas’ grip on her tightened.

“Gods...that’s it. Isn’t it? That’s why you were so concerned about it...that’s why you left the moment it was destroyed…”

“Vhenan…” Solas sighed into her shoulder. He lifted his head and looked into her eyes. “This is why we cannot be together. I cannot be honest with you and I cannot lie to you.” His eyes glazed over a bit and his gaze drifted away. “You deserve the truth and you deserve peace, but I can offer you neither. ”

Fira felt her throat tighten and pressure build behind her eyes. “Solas I understand why you couldn’t say anything before but...I’ll keep your secrets...I promise.”

Solas’ face was written in a hurt she couldn’t parse. His brow furrowed and he closed his eyes. 

“I know.” He looked at her again, a sad smile across his features that sent Fira’s heart plummeting. She let out a shaky exhale, suddenly overcome with guilt. 

She had come to find him when he didn’t want to be found. She had coaxed him into giving up his affections after he had clearly ended things. And now she was poking at his old wounds, prying into the pain of his past out of selfish curiosity. She felt her face flush with shame, regret sitting like a stone in her stomach.

To have lived in Arlathan and woken up to see how far the world of elves had fallen must have caused him an unfathomable misery. Yet he helped the Inquisition, even if he was after the orb, he had helped more than he needed to. He cared. And when she chased him and grabbed at him he had given in, took care of her and loved her even though....It would be kinder in the long run….he had said, and she realized it was her that had been unkind. 

Fira wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him close, pressing her cheek up against his ear and he squeezed her in return.

“Ar lath ma, I love you, Solas.” She breathed.

“Ar lath ma…” Solas repeated, his voice muffled against her shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extra big thank yous to KL because she helps me way too much she's way too nice I just cant even =_=
> 
> Also if you're interested, the title of this story and the chapters are lyrics from our #1 solavellan hellspiral song, [Here with me - Susie Suh & Robot Koch](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N3bgkE8sAg0)
> 
> So...enjoy?????


	5. Tossing and Turning Inside of Your Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More arguing. More smut. Blame KL.

Combing the woods for elfroot wasn’t her first choice of activity for the only day she would be spending with Solas in the foreseeable future, but she didn’t really have much of a choice. He was a few yards in front of her, crouching to collect leaves from a rather large plant. 

“Bring the satchel.” he said without turning.

Fira stepped towards him, instinctively avoiding twigs and dead leaves as she moved. She stopped when she reached his side and held the satchel open for him as he tossed plant bits inside.

The mood was a little tense but the notion of doing a mind-numbingly boring chore together made the situation feel weirdly normal.

“Do you have enough elfroot yet?” she sighed as Solas stood.

“One can never have enough elfroot.” he quipped, a light smile on his face as he looked down at her from his full height. 

Her heart fluttered and she was filled with a warmth for him. Followed immediately by annoyance that he could still have such an effect on her and a wave of loneliness as she reminded herself once again that she would be saying goodbye in a matter of hours. The tumult of emotion must have shown plainly on her face because his brow furrowed slightly and he snaked an arm around her waist to pull her upwards and place a kiss on her forehead. 

“Come.” he let go of her and started walking away. “There are caves to south and we are need of deep mushroom.”

Fira exhaled slowly and followed him.

“So…” she began. It was against her better judgement to attempt to probe him for information again, but knowing they had such little time left together compelled her to be reckless. “How long do you think it’ll take you to get to the fortress?”

Solas gave a thoughtful sigh. “It will be several days.. The terrain is not very forgiving, the blightlands begin at about half a day’s walk to the north.”

She hummed softly then continued. “And if your contact is dead like you suspect? How will you get in?” 

“It is a very large fortress, occupied by only a few hundred wardens. We will find a way inside, I am sure of it.”

Fira heard the confidence in his voice and couldn’t help but let her mind wander to the Solas of the past, skulking around the Temple of Sacred Ashes looking for that blighted orb. Solas approaching the Inquisition troops, surrendering himself under the pretense of wanting to _help_. How soon would he have abandoned them if the orb had been in that crater? Would he have left her to die if he had retrieved the orb before she woke up? He may have ultimately stayed to help, but thinking of his willful duplicity burned her cheeks.

“And if you have to go in the front door, what will you do? Feign interest in becoming a recruit?”

To his credit he didn’t pause or turn or even flinch, so far as she could see from her position behind him anyway. “If we must.” he replied flatly. 

They walked in silence for a few minutes before Fira couldn’t stand the weight of it anymore. “Well, I hope it’s worth it. Whatever it is.” she said dismissively.

She thought she heard Solas grunt but it was so quiet she couldn’t be sure. He stopped and turned his head, waiting for her to catch up and arrive at his side. She expected him to say something but instead he reached out and took her hand in his and resumed walking.

She stared down at their hands as he pulled her along. Their fingers were intertwined and his thumb was gently caressing her knuckles. It was such a small thing, but the affection softened her heart and killed her urge to antagonize him. She let the last of her bitter thoughts go with a steady exhale, mentally scolding herself for giving in to her anger when they had such little time.

They continued in silence for several minutes before Fira found her voice again. “So how far away are these caves?”

“Not much further... about ten minutes or so.” 

They walked slowly, trekking through the woods without speaking, Solas’ thumb still brushing back and forth across her knuckles as he led her through the underbrush. As the trees thinned and the terrain turned rocky, Fira caught the sound of trickling water in the distance. The idea of washing up and filling her waterskin with fresh water coming down from the hills was incredibly appealing.

“Ooohh, Solas, we should stop by that stream before we go back…” she suggested.

There was a pause before Solas responded which made Fira think he must have been deep in thought. “Ah, of course, vhenan.” Solas cleared his throat. “The cave is quite close now.”

They were descending into the damp rocky cave only minutes later. As the sunlight became scarce, Solas let go of Fira’s hand to cast a veilfire flame in the palm of his but she stopped him by catching his arm at his elbow, forcing him to turn.

“I can handle the light...” She grinned and lifted her right hand, letting the anchor flare, flooding the cave in green light. 

Solas was surprised for only a moment before he grabbed her at the wrist, the anchor sparking and crackling at his touch. Fira’s breath hitched and she instinctively tried to pull back.

“That is not it’s purpose.” he scolded her through gritted teeth, looking down at her with a severe expression.

Fira gaped at him and his unexpected response. “ _It’s fine._ ” she protested, narrowing her eyes at him. “It’s not actually doing anything.” She pulled at her arm again and he released her.

They glared at eachother for a moment before his eyes drifted away from her gaze. “You’re right. I apologize.” He turned and continued down the tunnel. Fira felt her shoulders sink once his back was to her. 

_What **was** that??_

Baffled and a little shaken, she stared at his back as they took careful steps along the slippery rocks, ruminating on his fierce reaction. He obviously knew there was no harm in it. The anchor had often flared on it’s own in the beginning when the magic was new and clumsy in her hand. She was actually quite proud of the amount of control she had achieved since that time. Was that the problem? Seeing her play with the power of the orb that was apparently so important to him? Was it so offensive to see her in control?

She might have goaded him about it but she didn’t have it in her anymore. She felt like she had been picking at him since she showed up. Even the fact that she _had_ shown up seemed antagonistic in retrospect. It was a confusing reaction but he had apologized and let it go so she resolved to push it from her mind as well.

“Here.” came Solas’ voice suddenly. He crouched down along the cave wall and began carefully breaking mushroom stalks from the stone. Fira shrugged the satchel off her shoulder and sat down on her knees next to him holding it open. 

“Thank you.” He kept his eyes on his work, his tone was cordial which made her feel cold. 

Fira sighed, a little heavier than she meant to, and Solas looked up at her. The Anchor’s green light was flickering across his features, making it difficult for her to parse his expression, but she could tell he was staring at her intently. He shifted and suddenly she felt his hands sliding around her waist and pulling her towards him. She rose up on her knees and let him kiss her lips. Gentle kisses, soft and cool, that made her tremble. 

“Solas…” she sighed into his mouth. He responded with a soft hum from the back of his throat as he began working to remove her coat.

Fira leaned her head back and let him lay kisses down her neck as he pushed her coat off over her shoulders. She pulled away from him and hastily peeled her tunic off over her head. She had yet to bring her arms back down when Solas had his palms on her ribs, pulling her breast band down and closing his mouth over a nipple. She moaned softly, resting her hands on the smooth skin of his crown, and he moved lower to bite the flesh of her breast. 

Fira dropped her hands, reaching between them to grab at the belt of his coat but suddenly his fingertips were digging into her sides and she was being lifted from her knees and flipped around in one swift movement, her bare chest crashing against a cold damp boulder that moments before had been at her back. She gasped in surprised and instinctively tried to push up off the rock but Solas had pinned her down with the weight of his body, bending low to press hot kisses onto the back of her neck. 

“Vhenan…” he whispered reassuringly to her as he moved his mouth slowly down her back. Breathing heavily with excitement she clung to the rock as he jerked her breeches down her thighs until they were bunched at her knees. His hands slid back up to hold her hips as he brushed his lips across her lower back, slowly pressing kisses up her spine until his body was heavy on top of her again.

Solas gently bit the flesh between her shoulder and neck and she let out a small cry to encourage him. He was nipping at her, working his way up her neck when she noticed the sounds of rustling leather and laces unlashing and the hot flesh of his cock hitting her ass as it broke free from his breeches. Her breath hitched in anticipation and she cried out, louder this time, when he thrust himself inside her.

He fucked her, his hands sliding up her sides pressing heavily into the curves of bone and flesh. She moaned and gasped and ground herself back against him, every thrust filling her in the most perfect way.

One of his hands began to slide back down her side, slowly moving towards her navel and then dropping lower until his fingertips were crushing into her clit, sending throes of blissful sensation through the length of her body.

She could hear his breaths growing staggered, groans of satisfaction against the shell of her ear. The notion that she was giving him so much pleasure sent her heart reeling and the pressure inside of her was close to bursting. Solas must have been close too because his face was pressing into her neck and his teeth were bared against her skin. And then she felt him release inside of her, a low groan from his throat spreading hot breath down her neck and she came hard, spasming around him as he continued to work inside of her. His hips began to slow but his fingers kept stroking her clit, drawing out every ounce of satisfaction from her orgasm.

“Vhenan…” Solas’ voice was low and breathy and he mumbled a few elvhen words she didn’t know before pausing and starting over. “Fira...you must always remember that I love you. No matter what happens, just promise me you’ll remember.”

Her heart felt like it was going to beat right out of her chest and she tried to shift beneath him. Solas pulled back and guided her away from the rock, turning her around settling her on her knees, holding her body against his. 

He held her tightly, one arm around her waist and the other up her back so he could wind his fingers into the hair at the nape of her neck. Her head felt light and her limbs felt heavy, but she forced her arms to move, to wrap around him and cling to the fabric of his coat as he pulled her hair gently and kissed her. It was deep and tender and somehow a little sad. She sucked his bottom lip into her mouth ran her tongue along it, savoring the taste of him. 

When their lips finally parted he rested his forehead against hers and spoke softly. “Ar lath ma, you are perfect.”

This time she had the strength to respond and she whispered back “Ar lath ma, vhenan’ara.”

They took their time separating. Small kisses and gentle caresses as he helped her pull her breeches back up over her hips. By the time she was sliding her arms into the sleeves of her coat, Solas’s breeches had been righted and he was picking up the mushroom stalks that had been dropped and scattered in carelessness. 

“Eehh..” Fira sighed as she was buckling the belt of her coat. “I could really use that stream right about now.” Solas looked up at her and she could see him grinning through the soft green glow of the Anchor. His expression made her cheeks heat up and she gave a small sheepish laugh. 

“Go ahead. I need a bit more mushroom and I am quite capable of collecting it myself. I will join you shortly.” he offered, standing up and placing a kiss on her forehead. 

She hesitated for a moment but nodded in agreement. “Ok...don’t take too long though. I’m going to be wet and naked, you know.” she teased, tugging on the belt of his coat. 

Solas gave an earnest laugh, “Yes, of course.” He smiled and turned away from her, casting a flame in his hand as he moved deeper into the cavern.

Fira couldn’t help but grin and let the warmth of his laughter fill her heart. He didn’t truly laugh very often and it was a sound that would always be precious to her. Even if it was prompted by a her silly innuendo. 

It didn’t take her long to reach the mouth of the cave and when she stepped into the open air she could hear the trickle of water immediately. The stream itself wasn’t very far either. She walked along the rocks to where the water was falling from the hills above, a perfect spot to wash up. 

Fira unbuckled her belt and shrugged her coat off, letting it fall onto the rocky bank. She began to pull her tunic up over her head when she felt a presence at her back. _Solas already?_ But it didn’t sit right with her so she pulled her tunic back down and whipped around to see a figure emerging from a cluster of trees. For a quick moment her heart stopped and she felt an immense regret at leaving her staff at camp but she relaxed for the most part when she realized it was only Abelas.

“Abelas…what are you doing out here?” her tone was a little harsh but it didn’t seem to phase him since he kept walking until he was directly in front of her, speaking swiftly in a low tone. 

“Inquisitor, we must speak. Now and quickly, while we are still alone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More Abelas in the next chapter, sorry to keep you waiting :P


	6. Caught in the Riptide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi hello sorry this took so long I had a hard time but now it's all done!! <3

“Abelas…what are you doing out here?” her tone was a little harsh but it didn’t seem to phase him since he kept walking until he was directly in front of her, speaking swiftly in a low tone. 

“Inquisitor, we must speak. Now and quickly, while we are still alone.”

Fira gaped and blinked at him. “What?”

Abelas didn’t seem to be concerned about her confusion. “Do you mean to follow us when we leave for Weisshaupt?” 

She opened her mouth to speak but her voice stalled in her throat. “I...I don’t…” She hadn’t really decided yet what her next move was going to be. She knew Solas would not allow her follow them openly, and if she showed up to the fortress after them she ran the risk of endangering their lives. Abelas had all but asked her to follow him to the Anderfels, did he want her to keep following?

Abelas was impatient for her to find her words, shifting his weight back and forth he cut her off. “You must not come to Weisshaupt.” 

“Oh..” she breathed but Abelas continued without much pause.

“Go to Kal-Sharok.”

“What?” Fira was just becoming more confused.

“You know where it is. When you get close they will stop you. If you tell them who you are they will take you to the thaig.”

“Whoa whoa wait.” Fira put her hands up in protest. “Why in the name of the nine creators would I want to go to Kal-Sharok??” she demanded.

“Because that is where we will be going once we complete our business at Weisshaupt. Although I cannot say how long you will have to wait.”

Fira squinted at him. His expression was stiff and unreadable. His tone was firm and devoid of emotion. Her inability to sense his motives gnawed at her. He had been playing at some goal since he had approached her near Serault and she was losing the fortitude to try and figure it out herself.

“And why exactly would you want me meeting up with you two again? Why do you care where I am? I know you don’t _enjoy my company_. So what is it, Abelas?” 

Abelas exhaled sharply through his nose and narrowed his eyes at her, his face finally breaking to show his frustration. “The power burned into your hand does not belong to you. You have no right to wield it. You cannot even comprehend its full meaning.” 

“ _Hey!!_ ” Fira stammered defensively, but he continued.

“Solas’ judgement is compromised, he lets his emotions get in the way of logic so he pushes you away to protect himself, when the power of the orb should be in…” Abelas paused for a quick moment while he seemed to consider his words. “...his possession.”

Fira rolled her eyes. “Right, you resent me for having the Anchor. You’ve got plenty of company there. But I _do_ have it. _I_ control it and we all just have to accept it. Why do you even care if Solas _possesses_ it or not??”

Abelas clenched his jaw and waited a beat before speaking again. “We will need it...eventually. He knows this. He is just avoiding the inevitable.”

Fira shook her head, flustered and irritated. “The inevitable what?? What do you need it for??”

Abelas crossed his arms and shifted his weight backwards, staring down at her. “....Come to Kal-Sharok. Perhaps you’ll find out.” 

And with that Abelas turned on his heel and walked back in the direction he had come. Fira gaped after him as he disappeared into the trees, annoyed and bewildered by the unexpected encounter. 

Her mind began cycling through her interactions with Abelas from the past week, searching for a hint of the resentment he had just revealed. He had been aloof with her, he had prodded her, but he never came off quite so cold as he just had. Did something change? Was he frustrated that she hadn’t convinced Solas to let her tag along?

Fira let her gaze drift towards the water falling over the rocks. 

You cannot come with us.

He had said it plainly. Even in that moment of tenderness he was rejecting her. The man had left her twice. The thought of pushing him to let her stay by his side just seemed altogether pointless and terrifying. She knew he was capable and willing to do whatever it took to leave her behind. How could she even entertain the idea of trying? There was barely anything left of her, being rejected again would finish her. So she would protect herself, they would part amicably, and she would survive. 

But what would Solas do if she were in Kal-Sharok waiting for him when they arrived…

“Vhenan..?”

Fira jumped and turned at the sound of his voice. 

Solas smirked at her and shook his head as he continued his approach from the direction of the cave.

“Are you alright?”

Fira wiped a hand down her face and laughed nervously. “Aaahh...I--I started to get undressed and then I just ...zoned out.” She shrugged at him and laughed again as he stopped in front her. Fira stepped forward to close the distance between them, pressing her breasts against his chest. 

She gazed up at him through her lashes and purred, “Maybe you could help me with my shirt?” 

 

\--------

 

Fira stared into the center of the fire. They had returned to camp only an hour before and the sun was already hanging low in the sky. It would be dark soon, they would have to sleep, and then Solas would be gone before she saw the sun again. The reality of it made her anxious and she forced herself to think ahead. Kal-Sharok. 

She had had a short and strange encounter with the dwarves of the mysterious thaig while she was with the Inquisition. They did not come off as the sort of people who would welcome a random elf into their realm. They did seem like the type to shoot her full of crossbow bolts first and ask questions later though, and perhaps that was Abelas’ true goal? She shook that thought from her mind. However spiteful Abelas had seemed she believed him that they needed her for...something. Something Abelas wasn’t going to tell her about. Because she wouldn’t do it? Possibly. Because the mystery of it was a means to influence her actions? Definitely. 

“You’re very quiet. What are thinking about?” Solas voice cut in, drawing her out of her headspace suddenly.

He was next to her, grinding elfroot into a paste. Or at least he had been. He had apparently finished while she was lost in thought.

“Oh...just...my brother.” she covered.

“Ah.” Solas placed a hand on her knee and squeezed. 

Fira placed her hand over his and smiled at him. “I still catch myself thinking… _he’s going to love it when I tell him about---_....and then I...ah..it’s silly.”

Solas thought for a moment before he spoke. “You will always think of them, vhenan. It will always hurt... but it will, eventually, become easier.”

Fira squeezed his hand in thanks but she couldn’t help but think about the excess of loss he must have experienced. She remembered when he returned from mourning the Spirit of Wisdom. He must have felt safety in a friendship with a benevolent spirit with no desire to leave the fade. He must have thought it so unlikely that he would lose her as he had lost….how many people? _Elvhenan_ sounded so singular but it was so many things and more importantly it was people. How many loved ones had he lost to time? Or even before he went to sleep? The depth of it filled her with sorrow and she found it almost comforting that she would likely never know.

“The meat is packed.” Abelas had been working quietly wrapping their supply of dried meat from the other side of the campfire.

“Good.” Solas reclaimed his hand from Fira’s grasp. “Then you can boil the elfroot.”

Abelas and Solas shared a look. Fira glanced back and forth between them. They were both very good at saying a lot with very blank expressions and not actually saying anything at all. It made her want to laugh but she refrained. The atmosphere between them was always so tense. Abelas broke eye contact first, turning to the side and reaching for the iron pot amongst their supplies.

Fira heard Solas exhale and turned back to see him reaching for his bedroll, picking himself up off the ground and tucking it under his arm.

He held out his other hand to her, offering to help her up.

“Come with me, vhenan.” he said softly, his eyes gentle and his expression full of warmth.

Fira smiled up at him and placed her hand in his, letting him pull her up off the ground. He kept her hand tightly grasped in his even after she was settled on her feet. Without saying anything else he turned and began to lead her out of the clearing away from the campfire. 

The sunlight was disappearing quickly and the darkness was leaving a chill in the air. The dirt was cool and dry under her feet. Fira inhaled slowly, letting her gaze drift to stare at him. Time seemed to slow for a moment as she took in the sight of him, studying him, memorizing how she felt with her hand in his. She followed the line of his profile, his distinguished nose, his strong chin. She couldn’t help but feel homesick for him already, a preemptive emptiness in her chest that made her panic a little. 

Fira took a measured breath to even out her nerves and Solas spoke suddenly.

“I came across this spot some time ago. It’s not far from here, I think you’ll find it engaging.”

She hummed in interest. “What’s there?”

“Not much now. It used to be a small shrine, though to what I am not certain. It is very old Tevinter, before the Imperium. I visited the spot in the fade only once but I did not see anything particularly informative.” As he spoke Solas’ voice fell into a familiar cadence. She was reminded of the peculiar scholar, before he was her lover, standing in the rotunda, his frescoes lighting up the walls, telling her about the wonders he had experienced in the fade. 

She smiled at him, the memory and the man in the present.

“Fascinating.” she teased.

Solas grinned and gave a quiet chuckle as he continued leading her through the trees. The sun was completely gone from the sky a few moments later when they reached the edge of a clearing. A rather large clearing, the other side just barely visible through the swiftly darkening twilight.

Fira noted two large stone pillars, fallen long ago, half buried in the ground and covered in moss.

“Ah...this is it, then?” she asked, gesturing to the ruins.

“That is the shrine, yes.” Solas grinned and looked at her until she looked back at him. “However, the reason I brought you here.” Solas lifted his chin and looked up, prompting her to do the same.

“Ah!” Fira gasped slightly and smiled at the sight. The clearing was large enough to create a break in the canopy, a perfect window to reveal a smattering of white stars in the black sky. 

In the past they had often laid out under the stars while traveling. They would talk about the constellations, make up their own, let the conversation drift to other topics or activities.

Solas pulled her forward until they were in the approximate center of the clearing, then let go of her hand and gestured for her to wait.

Fira stood and watched patiently as he went about the familiar routine of effortlessly placing a fire rune under the dirt and carefully laying out the bedroll over top. Solas shrugged off his coat and she did the same, folding it over a couple times before dropping it on the ground. 

They sat down and Fira paused while he laid back and stretched out his arm so she could rest her head on his shoulder and snuggle in. He squeezed her close and she buried her face into his sweater. He was so warm. The ground beneath her was warm. It all felt so normal and familiar and it tore her heart in two as she wrestled with the desire to enjoy it and the survival instinct telling her it wasn’t going to last.

Solas turned his head to place a kiss on her crown before he spoke. “So who is up there tonight?”

Fira adjusted herself, rolling over and laying her head on his chest so she could look up into the sky. “Ah...I see...Satinalis.” She lifted her arm and pointed out the pattern of stars in that formed the shape of the seated man with a lyre.

Solas made a confirming hum from his throat and nuzzled his nose into her hair.

“Are you paying attention?” she teased, tilting her chin up to peek at him.

“Of course.”

“Mmhmmm…” she hummed skeptically as Solas’ arm tightened around her ribs so he could cup her breast in his hand. Fira chuckled lightly, squirming into him as he groped and nuzzled. Her gaze drifted back up the stars. It occurred to her that she hadn’t looked at them, _really_ looked at them since the last time they had laid under them together.

“...wolf!” Fira piped up after a few seconds of silence.

Solas stiffened around her. 

“Fenrir, the white wolf, he’s up there.” she lifted her arm again to point out the constellation. “You’re really not paying attention.” Fira scolded him playfully and twisted her body to look at him directly.

“Ah...” Solas seemed to have been holding his breath but now he was smirking at her. “No. Not to the stars at least.”

Something about the way he was looking at her made Fira blush and she tried not to grin. Solas reached out and cupped her chin, pausing to look at her for a beat before he began to twist his body to the side and draw her up to pull her into a kiss.

Fira couldn't help but smile against his lips as she scooted and adjusted her body to press against him. She flattened her palms against his chest and tangled her legs with his as he slid his free hand from her jaw to her waist and then lower to rest on the curve of her ass.

“Solas.” she sighed, resting her head on the arm he had stretched out under her neck. Solas placed a few kisses on her neck then rested his head on his shoulder to look into her eyes, their noses barely an inch apart.

“Hmm?” 

“Just...don’t get killed at Weisshaupt, okay?” 

She wanted to beg him to let her come and help. She wanted to ask when and if he meant to see her again. She wanted him to choose her over whatever it was he was doing but it all felt too heavy and she all but knew what his response would be.

“I will do my best.” His tone was playful but he seemed to recognize the signs of her distress. 

But he said nothing else and she knew there was nothing else for him to say.

Fira shut her eyes tight and snuggled into him. He pulled her as close as he could, their foreheads pressed together and legs woven and locked.

They stayed that way until she fell asleep. 

It was still dark when he woke her. Confusion and grogginess made her head feel heavy.

“It is time to go.” he said quietly as he helped her up.

As they walked back to the campfire to meet with Abelas she realized she had no memories of dreaming that night.

Abelas was already awake when they arrived. They ate quickly and packed their things in silence while Fira watched from the fallen log, her staff in her lap and her pack on her back.

The morning felt so strange. Her head was fuzzy and she could tell she was merely drifting through it.

The sky had begun to glow, orange clouds against dark blue. They made their way to the path as a group.

“You can catch up to me.” Abelas announced without even bothering to turn around. They watched him disappear down the path. 

Fira felt the panic flooding her insides.

Solas reached out and cupped her face with both hands. She studied his face and her heart sunk when she recognized the familiar mask of indifference sliding over his features.

_We must focus on what truly matters._

Fira tried to push it from her mind, tried to hold back the growing pressure behind her eyes. 

Solas kissed the corner of her mouth then let go of her face and backed away.

_Please, vhenan._

She physically shook her head this time. Her cheeks felt hot and she was almost certain her hands were shaking.

“Dareth shiral.” he recited in a tone that sent a hot tear down her cheek.

She quickly wiped her chin with the back of her hand.

“Dareth shiral.” she repeated back to him.

Solas turned and made his way down the path and Fira watched his back until he was out of sight.

The dread and panic consumed her. She crouched there in the middle of the path and allowed herself only a few sobs before she stood back up and wiped her face.

She turned and began walking in the other direction.

To Kal-Sharok.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty much the happiest tentative headcanon I can accept for my Inquisitor and Solas is that they occasionally, maybe once a year, run into each other out in the world and have some good smooching and sexy times before parting ways again.  
> However, I'm certain we're going to see Solas again and have to deal with some sort of conflict in DLC or maybe DA4? --- and we're all going to have to adjust our headcanons accordingly. And cry probably.  
> Anyway thanks for powering through this whatever it is, you're a peach whoever you are <3


End file.
